#i think i can get the general vibes of which is which. but who knows what the fuck i was thinking then lol
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Sonic X Shadow Takeover Analyzer (Part 2)
I was so excited to hear this Takeover since it is only Sonic and Shadow talking to each other and answering question. It is one of those times where you get to see their dynamic without anyone else's input.
Since I feel like I could write an essay about these two, I decided to instead put all my thoughts into bullet points, this being Part 2 of my list:
Obligatory ''Shadow likes Latinas'' joke.
I love how Sonic sees their rivalry as a friendly competition, even describing it as being two sides of the same coin and pushing each other to be better. Shadow points out how he fights because he has a purpose and he will fight Sonic if their ideals clash. Sonic isn't buying it, though. He really wants to make it clear that his presence is important to Shadow and he wants to hear that from Shadow himself. Shadow finally agrees, with Sonic sounding so proud of himself.
Addendum: Considering how the cutscene battle in Sonic X Shadow Generations went, Shadow definitely can't resist fighting Sonic to best him, regardless of his own goals. Their rivalry gives him purpose.
''GO OFF KING!!'' Sonic, what?! X3
Shadow goes on a rant about Super Monkey Ball, with Sonic immediately trying to apologize for the whole thing. It's hilarious!
''THOSE MONKEYS NEED TO PUT ON SOME PANTS!!'' Shadow, you don't even wear pants.
I love how when Sonic and Shadow talk about Jet, Sonic immediately turns the question to be about their rivalry, pointing out how their little competition is why Shadow keeps Sonic around. Shadow just groans in exasperation, but we all know Sonic's telling the truth.
Black Doom really has an obsession with Radical Highway. I suppose Radical Highway is to Shadow what Green Hill Zone is to Sonic. Also, love how Shadow retorts to Sonic's ''Radical'' pun by calling him ''Mr. Green Hill Zone''.
When they're asked to draw something, their immediate response is to draw each other, with Sonic even trying to give some input to Shadow. They're not the best at it, though; something they wholeheartedly agree on.
Shadow is so proud to have his Year, and Sonic likes it too, to the point of showering him with constant compliments. Shadow enjoys it, but claims how he's not ''seeking attention''. Nobody's buying that Shadow.
Sonic Shuffle get mentioned!!
Shadow played chess with Maria, which is really nice. Also, if Sonic ever plays chess with Shadow, he'd totally be the guy who eats the chess pieces, much to Shadow's confusion. Also, the fact that Shadow claims how Sonic would lose on purpose to annoy him is both hilarious and also kinda sweet, considering how Sonic has been acting in this whole Takeover.
Fadel is back and trying to get into either Team Hero or Team Dark... and Sonic and Shadow clearly refuse to have him on their teams. I find it hilarious how Sonic immediately directs him to Team Dark and Shadow claims how applications are closed, then points him at Team Hero and gaslights Sonic into reluctantly accepting Fadel into the team.
I actually watched Games Cage's reaction to that, and he is completely oblivious to the fact that Sonic is being passive-aggressive by mentioning how Tails called dibs on their only parachute, meaning Sonic is cool with letting the guy fall off the Tornado. X3
Sonic is so persistent about wanting to hug Shadow! I get Sonic Prime vibes from this and I'm loving it.
''I don't need... your kind of hugs.'' There's two things I can conclude from this:
Shadow only likes the hugs Maria and Amy gave.
Shadow actually would be fine with Sonic hugging him, but they have to be meaningful rather than fleeting considering his earlier comment. Sonic is totally oblivious to that, though.
Sonic Boom ''Shadow broods in a cave'' reference!
Besides training, Shadow's hobby is reading. He's a bookworm, and Sonic sounds so excited about learning that. I can totally see Sonic thinking about dragging Shadow into another Storybook Adventure.
Shadow's first time turning Super was still him learning how to control that power. It explains why he ran out of energy back then, while Sonic had more experience and could keep it longer. Sonic also keeps complimenting Shadow about looking cool in his Super Form, even calling him wise for pointing out how that power needs to be controlled.
WHY DOES SONIC HAVE ABRAHAM TOWER ON SPEED DIAL?!
Shadow definitely doesn't work for G.U.N. That's something that has been confirmed. I have to say, the whole conversation between the Commander and Shadow was really awkward, but the kicker is Sonic's being oblivious to the whole awkwardness. He is so proud that he arranged a call between them.
I love how Sonic's neutral opinion about Orbot changes immediately the moment he hears Shadow's own thoughts on the robot. Once Shadow says he dislikes Orbot, Sonic immediately agrees with him, and when Orbot offers to get them coffee, causing Shadow to like him, Sonic also agrees that Orbot is fine. This really feels like Sonic wants Shadow's approval by agreeing with his opinions.
Sonic and Shadow are arguing about who is better at raising their Chao. They legit sound like married couple arguing about how to take care of their children. Sonic is definitely the fun dad, while Shadow has to take care of the discipline.
Shadow doesn't believe in ghosts, despite Sonic pointing out how they ran into paranormal stuff several times. Sonic also tries to scare him a couple of times, with Shadow showing no reaction.
Shadow's favorite Doom Power is Doom Morph, and Sonic is a little jealous of that form once he hears more about it. The fact that Shadow just keeps bragging about it and annoying Sonic is hilarious.
''Skill issue!'' Lol, Shadow. I can imagine Sonic rolling his eyes at that comment.
Shadow scolds the person who listens to the Twitter Takeover instead of studying for their exam. He really cares about their education, while Sonic points out how he needs to lighten up.
Let's be honest, Sonic and Shadow definitely love hanging out with each other, admitting it in their own way that they care about each other.
I believe that this Takeover proves that Sonic and Shadow really have a good dynamic when they sit down and hang out with each other. They bicker, they tease each other, they come to agreements and disagreements, they care... It is so enjoyable to listen to them and I'm looking forward to seeing more!
Oh, and yeah, this was a feast for the Sonadow fans, if you ask me. I hope you guys will enjoy my notes, because I'm definitely going to take advantage of all the new information I got. I can't wait for the meal we'll get once the Sonic the Hedgehog 3 movie comes out.
#Sonic X Shadow Takeover Analyzer (Part 1)
#Sonic Cyber Revolution (Masterlist)
#Ten's Thoughts#sonic the hedgehog#shadow the hedgehog#sonic x shadow#sonic x shadow generations#sonadow#sonic twitter takeover#shadow twitter takeover#twitter takeover#sonadow generations
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I can explain! I have to start by defining "anti-ship", because that term actually came first. Basically, a while ago, probably close to 10 years now, people started getting sorta hostile over ships that "squicked" them. Basically, people on here mostly, and other fandom sites too, would start listing "Anti-" before specific ship names, to show that they were hostile to people who shipped them. They would do this in tags (often to make sure it didn't appear in the shippers tags, actually) or in bio, to let shippers know they would go after you and even post callouts if you liked the ship they were against. Sometimes it was more like a Do Not Interact, but generally it got pretty bad. They also self-identified as "antis" or "anti-[ShipName]".
So in response to the increasingly hostile and harassing behaviour of people who were "anti-ship", other people started putting "anti-anti" in their bio. Basically, "If you are against other ships to the point of identifying as an 'anti', then I am against you, and the concept of BEING an anti. Basically I don't care what anyone ships, you can interact with me safely." "Anti-Anti" was just an "I won't hurt you over fiction" sign on peoples blogs and accounts. More of a safety signal to others. However Anti-anti was also very confusing as a term, tbh, and slowly over time, people were like... "Hmm, well the opposite of being anti-something is being pro-something, so lets start using the term 'Pro-ship' instead."
Since then, the terms have gotten muddied. Antis became less of "I hate THIS PARTICULAR ship" and more "I hate people who like this group of specific fictional taboo tropes or kinks". Proshippers became less of "I don't care what you ship" and became more of a "Censorship is bad, and I stand for anti-harassment, pro-kink, and sex-positivity" vibe. Also Proshippers have a "Don't Like; Don't Read" and "Ship and Let Ship" mentality. These were older fandom terms that were summarized by curating your reading and interaction to what you yourself are comfortable with. Blocking and muting, reading tags properly, and using the back button on your browser are considered the best ways of avoiding the fictional "squicky" stuff that grosses you out.
Antis also began heavily attacking the proshippers as a whole, even to the point of lying about what it means. Antis made up a lie that the "pro" in proship stands for "problematic", as a way of making them seem evil and gross. Antis started calling SPECIFIC PAIRINGS "proships" which actually doesn't make any sense. Antis also lie and tell ppl "proshippers ship any pairing that would be illegal in real life" when the actual ships have NOTHING to do with the term "proship".
Many people who are proship have literally the same ships as antis, and are squicked out by taboo kinks... they just don't believe in attacking people over it, cause it's just fiction.
Recently a group of antis who think "proship means problematic" ALSO made up the term "proship neutral" which actually is the original definition of proship, ie. "don't care what ppl ship".
You can find reciepts and history on Fanlore's article here
As well as these information cards by Tikli
This question was sent to our inbox. If you’d like for us to post a This or That poll for you, send the 2 things you want to see against each other to our inbox and we’ll let the people decide which one they prefer. Everything will be anonymous.
#proship#proship vs anti#Sage wades into the wank#will I regret this?#I just want to tell people the true history because i watched it all happen#I can't stand when people lie or say wrong things and don't even look it up
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you guys are all secretly (or not) trying to guess how Will would fuck but I can actually tell you through Hugh's chart, cause we've stablished that actors are casted in roles that represent their energetic configurations yada yada so.
We can look at two positions: the Moon, which is our psyche and our foundation, and the most influential part of our personalities and how we function in reality, the Moon being a water element astro it rules the senses (no, not venus) and the sacral chakra.
And we can look at Mars, the primal force and impulse of life, the sex drive itself.
With him we have two energies that have very strong built animal archetypes, the buffalo 🦬 and the elephant 🐘, which I don't think we didn't already suspect that but. Boy has it big. Whatever...he is flaunting it around in his tight jeans and in almost every full body shot in Hannibal.
I'd say it's not dainty either. If you catch the buffalo elephant drill.
Mars manifests here in the yin polarity, while his Moon is yang. This indicates a more internally directed sex drive, which makes sense for Will's whole psychosexual vibes. It indicates that his drive is more mental than physical, specially with a Swati Moon which is a very "airy" Moon, and Revati Mars is also very mental, being ruled by Mercury. So this isn't somebody who is acting on their impulses that much. It tends to stay in his head for most of the time. Which if overload does tend to cause issues which Will sure is familiar with lol.
His foundation and senses being Swati's energy, it could indicate who loves to role play or create tiny universes for themselves to indulge and interact with for their own delight. I'd say there's a pretty creative mind here. Lots of fantasies.
Swati natives also tend to struggle with anything that they feel restrict them, unlike other archetypes who enjoy having structure and boundaries as safety, they do not. So, I'm sorry girlies but he might look like a sub twink but it's only because of the Rahu facial features. That man prefers to dominate. Not saying he wouldn't submit, he very much would, but, and I think that makes even more sense with the show, Swatis only submit to extremely dominant forces, meaning it takes a certain type to actually get them to submit and they are extremely resistant. Which. Literally Will fleeing like a fucking deer from Hannibal throughout the show (psychologically and emotionally) then finally allowing full connection at the end.
So anyway, cause I know that's what you kinky bitches want to know: how does he fuck?
He is generally dominant until someone is able to get him to submit out of LOVE, not force (Swati rules the Heart). He likes creative games in bed, you need to connect with him on an intellectual level to turn him on (Revati, his Mars is ruled by Mercury and concentrates energy in the head). Likely into BDSM (Revati and Bharani are energies that dwell in a transcendental spiritual stage, and tend to enjoy dynamics that are seen as taboo) and other kinky shit. Revatis are super kinky, actually so lol.
For ultimate satisfaction he needs to connect with his partner in a way that literally dissolves his ego. This is not the personality type to enjoy casual hookups, regardless if they engage in it or not. They are searching for pleasure that is transcendental.
#im bharani we are sex soulmates please#nbc hannibal#hannigram#will graham#hannibal#murder husbands#hannibal lecter#hugh dancy#sorry for exposing you miss dancy#hope you're getting transcendental shags#astrology#analysis#astro#vedic astrology#sexy analysis
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the mighty nein - critical role
this is a place where i don't feel alone. this is a place where i feel at home.
#also with softer vibes. i offer They#every silly little brainheart found family deserves a to build a home edit#the mighty nein maybe most of all. thats my family#also the lyrics deliciously well suited to m9.#when jester pulls that. stupid tarot card for fjord. home or traveler. and there's a carnival wagon. and veth says Thats Us! . them#i just think about . the tower is their home the xhorhouse is their home the lavish chateau is their home the balleater. the mistake.#the nein heroez. veth and yezas apartment. the dome. fjord and jesters living room floor.#a bar with a silly name on rumblecusp#also like. the song has stone and dust imagery. gardens and trees.#the inherent temporality of life and love and how that holds no bearing on how greatly people can love. im losin it okay.#ive been making this edit for days straight with my computer screaming at me for trying to shove 143 episodes of cr into a 2min20sec video.#crying becuase. theyre a family do you get it. they were nine lonely people and most of them had given up on seeing their own lives#as something that might be good. something that might make the world a better place. and in the end they're heroes.#and it doesn't matter if no one else knows because They know they're heroes. and they wouldn't've believed that was true when they met.#rattling the bars of my enclosure. to be loved is to be changed#posted on twitter and want to get in the habit of posting here too bc.#general reasons but also bc . i have noticed some of the ppl liking/sharing it are also ppl who shit on my ops by vaguing about my posts#which is in general whatever but does leave a funny taste in my mouth.#critical role#the mighty nein#cr2#caleb widogast#caduceus clay#jester lavorre#fjord#veth brenatto#yasha nydoorin#beauregard lionett#mollymauk tealeaf#my posts
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anon had a much different message I’ll try to get back to But it spiraled off in my brain and I think like, a character note about the twins especially in the beginning is that they’re very uncomfortable with (if not with most loud emotions) crying. exactly like my brother and I tbr alisaie is not comfortable with it even if it sometimes happens to her without her consent, so she stuffs it behind being snappy so it’ll stop. as the story goes on she doesn’t necessarily get more comfortable with it, she just gets around people who make her feel more okay about it. alphy just seemed unused to it in general - nothing in his life has ever caused emotion like that to overwhelm either reason or ego or logic, and so it just never happened, and even when he was upset he always always distanced how he felt about things from what his role was in the real world. like as a ten year old they were doing this. after hw it kind of starts happening to him wether he wills it or no, mostly around bittersweet or moments of stress release. which rly leads me to believe in the space between arr and hw was a lot more unmentioned (or obliquely mentioned, they kinda leave it to you) awful attempts at feeling really harsh emotions by someone who’s just genuinely never done it before than we hear about directly. he’s just never cried since he was tiny, and it probably sucked. anyways alisaie understands the emotional weight of events instantly and gets to react to them even if she dislikes it later and becomes determined to fix, while alphy still retains the habit of quickly separating himself from an event until it’s like, done with and either fixed or nothing we can do, and then falls apart. they both kinda try to hide it anyways
#I’m not sure where to put these thoughts but I have them. And now you have them#ffxiv#kipspeak#I just think about them. and also the scene where the remaining braves are all encouraging and happy. ;w;#also also the scene where fourchenault (REDACTED FOR SPOILERS)#the short stories… I haven’t read them all but I read the ones about the twins. and estinien bc he’s funny#I just feel very strongly about the dichotomy of how they act vs how they feel vs how many emotions are stuffed into too small bodies#vs how mature they can actually be like a lot . Never on purpose do they do something childish except with each other. which is a shame#Because I want them to. get cat snuggled idiots#Sharlayan in general gives off a very oh you’re feeling? I thought you were working type vibe. of a city#You know who else gives me the same vibes as the twins. Krile#how many times does krile emote loudly. ok then how many times does she say I wish you didn’t see this or something#stress is constant and obvious but we are not going to see it! There’s work!!!
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HSNGMSJDK I have mixed feelings on this… 🤔
To start off, I admittedly didn’t vibe with Beloved Enemy that much either. If I were to briefly get a bit more into my own personal tastes here, it might be surprising to people who know me that I didn’t like Yuan Yang as much, because he’s dog-coded (wolf-dog) and usually that’s a character type I gravitate towards.
But there were a couple reasons for this:
The first is that Yuan Yang’s crematorium didn’t personally satisfy me because I prefer the ones with full-on regret and sobbing and all that good stuff (I have learned of myself that I enjoy regret as a theme when done well MSKSFKHS). But Yuan Yang actually went for…an asshole route??? Which didn’t exactly work well in my opinion.
I feel like that’s maybe why I prefer Yu Fengcheng despite him not being all that dog-coded. He takes the badass top and even military man “bad boy”—or at least, hooligan/sexual deviant—and does it better in terms of loyalty and eventual regret. Plus, I like his occasionally nurturing role but also how his stoicness makes his moments where he acts cute all the more memorable (kind of like how it also is with Li Yu). He’s not that popular in the overall 188男团 fandom but I actually have a lot of things I like about Yu Fengcheng—even though I know the whole “conflict” over Huo Qiao is a bit weird and weak HSMKFSHS.
(And yeah, when speaking realistically, a lot of what Yuan Yang does is very despicable. Although it didn’t quite affect me the way it may have for OP.)
But the main thing is that Beloved Enemy itself is…quite cliché, in my opinion?
Office workers and then the top being gruff and aggressive and possessive and a “bad boy” aren’t anything new, and when I read the kidnapping plot, even though I know that and the ICU are kind of staples of the 188男团, I still went, “Ah, this feels a bit forced…” (I also felt the same way about a slightly similar scene in My Little Poplar, but a bit less so because it contributed to some of the themes you can glean from the novel in a way I didn’t feel like Beloved Enemy’s kidnapping plot does).
So funnily enough, Beloved Enemy is a story I actually think is better consumed via the manhua???
I love manhua as a medium but I fully admit, a lot of the manhua that directly adapt a novel can lose some stuff in translation, mostly in terms of expressing thoughts—especially when they’re rushing to adapt every important novel scene. But the Beloved Enemy manhua, aka Tit-for-Tat, softens Yuan Yang a lot by really upping his puppy dog side, with chibis and facial expressions and stuff. And the artist translates characters’ thoughts into the visual medium quite well!
I can actually see how Yuan Yang and Gu Qingpei are falling for each other and into each other more than I felt it in the novel itself.
It’s thus not a surprise to me the manhua artist is a huge YuanGu lover—you can see the passion in their adaptation DKGNSKSJ. I am still kind of dreading the actual crematorium part, which we’re nearing, but I have hopes the manhua artist will continue to soften him via the more expressive nature of art.
And well, speaking of a visual adaptation…
The other reason I have my reservations about this is just kind of mixed feelings about some of the out-of-country adaptations in general??
This is a personal thing because I have a frustration at BL drama fans calling Chinese BL cdramas “bromance” due to the censorship when the intent is so clearly BL, so even when I like getting an uncensored adaptation, I do find some people’s disregard for Chinese media being Chinese in origin a bit frustrating. Like how when you’re a fan of the adaptation (whether it’s Thai, Taiwanese, or maybe even a game/donghua getting a dub), people don’t think about the original.
Another for live-action adaptations is just that I prefer animated/drawn, and I’d honestly be way more into getting an audio drama than a live-action drama (still rolling, screaming, dreaming for an official My Little Poplar audio drama…). 😆
Again, these are completely personal gripes though LGNSKDJS.
I do find it interesting to hear again and again about how My Stand-In disappointed actual Professional Body Double fans because of the sanitization, but also that gap between the drama fans and the novel fans where novel fans notice drama fans condemning parts of the show as toxic even though it was toned down.
If I were to go into a tangent here, I don’t believe characters and plots doing bad/dark things is automatically “problematic” or a sign the author condones it and I wish people wouldn’t just judge characters via “did I like them/did they annoy me/did they do a bad thing,” but that’s a completely separate topic. Still, it does show how people just can’t handle “darker” stuff without finding it condemnable.
So…yeah idk how that’ll go with Beloved Enemy ALFJSKFHS.
I can kind of get why they chose this for adaptation though. It may have its clichés, but hey, clichés are popular for a reason, and YuanGu are really popular. I could see most BL fans enjoying it because even if the toxicity will get criticism, some people seem really drawn to office workers and a young bad boy topping an older cunning man?
I do find it interesting though one YuanGu fan on Twitter had reservations because they felt like Beloved Enemy is really culturally Chinese and that could get lost in translation… Which I feel like could apply to a number of danmei, but also I guess it shows how mixed feelings about this drama seem to apply overall in both fans and non-fans of Beloved Enemy?? 😆
Anyway, sorry for hijacking your post, OP, especially when our thoughts may diverge on some aspects. This just got me thinking, and when I do thinking in such a way, I tend to ramble to try and express those thoughts. 🙈
I will say that seeing Zhao Jinxin get adapted could be so fun! He can indeed be quite cute~
Thoughts on Beloved Enemy Getting a Thai Adaptation
Originally this was a response to another post but I think it deserves its own. To be honest I'm not confident about this project at all. This is (imo) not one of SQC's strongest works and is really really really not fitting for today's BL audience. To demonstrate what I mean, here's an alignment chart of 8 of the (current) eleven gongs/tops in the 188 series (courtesy of a moot of mine on X, link to the original thread in the description).
Ming is the guy highlighted in purple. Look at how high he is situated relative to the other guys (and this is his novel counterpart btw). Now I love (most of) my 188 blorbos so it is with true affection that I say Ming really is pretty mild for 188 standards but I remember everyone losing their collective shit over Ming and he was already sanitised in the show. Basically 99% of you can't handle Yuan Yang (or whatever his name will be in Thai). It's not even just the non-con. I'm not sure how familiar people are with the original plot of the Beloved Enemy novel but without spoiling too much, the main conflict is so vile that even I, a resident toxic yaoi enjoyer, was traumatised by it. The moot who made the chart even explained that they added the 人渣 scale specifically because of Yuan Yang. Is he uniquely bad, no, not really actually. He's just really bad in a boring basic way that I lost interest and couldn't even stand to read the extras.
Seriously, why THIS particular IP (I know why, it's for money) when Winner Takes All is right there. Look at him, Zhao Jinxin is the cutest red flag, he's not even a red flag, he's a pink flag. He will gaslight you, he gaslit me, he's the gaslighting king (actually no, that's probably Luo Yi or Shao Qun but Jinxin actually won me over so really who wins).
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Amanda... I miss her.
But I don't trust a single person to write her other than Ostrander/Yale. Like I don't trust them to do it right. Because like it's easy to write her being shady and manipulative and involved in secret government conspiracies. That's what she does. But it feels so hollow once you've seen her character in the way Ostrander describes it. Like she is a woman who is desperate and trying to do what she thinks is right. She has found a place of power (as a fat Black woman in the 1980s) and is doing anything she can to fight and hold onto it as powerful and ambitious men try and steal it from her. So she doubles down. She doubles down on the shady deals and the broken promises and the violence and she destroys her enemies, and loses a part of her soul in the process. And then some other ambitious politician rises up and the process repeats itself over and over and over again as each time she loses more of her morality and more of her soul and more of the respect her colleagues had for her. In place of that she gains more power, she gains fear, and an even more badass reputation. Until by the end of the book the villains begin to understand/sympathize with her more than the heroes ever will. Like THAT is who Amanda Waller is. It may happen subtly, it may happen over a longer period of time but that descent is a critical part of her character! She is a tragic character! And I feel like every perception of Suicide Squad I've seen outside of the original has her as this static villainous snapshot which is just untrue to her core imo. Like she is not a hero. But she is also not JUST a villain. She is a highly flawed character who is always descending farther and farther into villainy as she is led there by what she believes is right.
#maybe the problem is there isnt as much of a side cast in the later suicide squads from what ive seen.#bc the reactions of the government workers and prison workers are CRITICAL in this#also like. suicide squad isn't all villains guys. its a mix of prisoners and government workers with various moralities who can all general#ly join together in one thing: hating amanda waller#GOD I-#so many feelings abt her#also like lemme know if people think shes actually done okay in non 80s comics bc from what ive seen and the vibe it gets it seems bad#maybe i should go back to the 80s i probably missed some appearances there#but 80s plots are so annoying though 99% of the time its either new gods space shenanigans but weirder or visits to a made up country#obviously based on real ones which are then used for cold war propaganda#hgggggg#but like you can tell so easy when ppl dont get her. bc theyre all like amanda waller (derogatory) when REALLY its waller (derogatory)#(affectionate) (derogatory). at times with another affectionate or derogatory (or repeat of both) thrown in at the end#amanda waller#suicide squad#the suicide squad#dc meta#dc comics#blah#she gets painted as this 2 dimensional villain when to me shes literally like the hero of a greek tragedy#tonight is an amanda waller thoughts kind of night ig
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I doubt the devs meant for cloud strife to be so autistic-coded, but holy hell does he come across autistic
#the number of times I’ve said he’s just like me fr#esp in rebirth there have been multiple moments i just pointed at the screen and said autism#the beginning when tifa is talking about how she saw someone they used to know with a woman who looks like a model or something#then notices cloud and says ‘but you’re not interested in this are you’ and he just bluntly replies ‘not really’ and then after a second of#silence adds ‘uh but I’ll listen. go on’ i screamed#then later when aerith asks him what kind of swimsuit he’d like to see#probably i think flirting#and he launches into a spiel about how he prefers function over form and it needs to be practical and he has a lot of specific opinions abt#this and aerith is just standing there like🧍♀️#when you first get to the gold saucer and barret notices cloud is not vibing w this big bright loud amusement park and offers that they#go find the hotel and rest#when aerith is giving her speech about being an ancient i chose ‘smile’ as a way to quietly encourage her#and cloud could not do it on command. it was so bad#the fact that you can get really into queen’s blood and have cloud collect all the cards and become the highest ranked player in the world#(which is what i have been doing)#even though this literally has nothing to do w the quest he’s on#the way he just in general does not seem to like being touched or touching others often#autism. autism autism autism autism#final fantasy
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Oh I have been looking FORWARD to this!!!
Excellent in media res opening, you get us into Fu's insecurities & head-space so smoothly and his ensuing logic, along with setting up Trixx's gambit which I am super curious about to say the least!
As before, more excellent in media res, flashbacks are hard to use but you set it up so smoothly without disrupting the frantic nature of the fight or how off balance Marinette is without a partner this early in her career. It makes sense Marinette's just been low key happy but also not noticing Chloe's absence from her life and is only keying in now, the little details are nice touches as Marinette is a very detail oriented person but one with a heavy reliance on her gut. Chloe's continuing meltdown outside of the façade Purrge allows her to keep up came off really well, the "I know, I suck!" aspect was especially telling, I like Bustier making an effort though clearly being out of her depth given the circumstances. Also gosh, Chloe hissing XD
Adrien: So the Cat Miraculous does make us behave more like cats! Plagg: No, no I do not, don't pin this on me kid. Chloe: (Climbing to the highest place to hiss at people more)
Also nice to see the rest of the class showing some agency and activity on their own without prompting from the MCs, and that whole bit with Marinette nominating Alya only to realize Alya wasn't gonna nominate her was great, I loved their dialogue exchange they are so witty and fun and oooh the confused ball of Adrien feelings, I love it!
Solid break out from the flashback too, and a very smooth introduction with Fu, I love her not realizing his age due to the Miraculous mask effect and his dialogue. I dunno, I just really like how you write his manner of speech. Also more Adrien feels! Fu's method of just leaving Miraculous with people who's vibes are right may come back to bite him XD
"That which was not known could not be pursued, much less caught."
As before I love the distinct manner in which he comes off with, everyone has their own voices, but Fu's is perhaps the most distinct which makes sense given his age and life experience. Sewer Hat Boy, another victim of the Miraculous mask effect and I love the manner in which Chloe is described, very much feels like a feline in human form. The fight itself was awesome, Fu's general nervousness really did not serve him well (Overall) in this fight, constantly over-thinking and fretting and then losing himself in a flashback while Chloe's turned off everything but fight mode. The swapping of the Cataclysm was an inspired idea and gods:
“Five minutes left to show you just how big of a mistake you’ve made.”
Is such a badass line and mental image!!!
Great intro with Adrien's scene, smoothly setting up Nino's upcoming presence and I love the Marinette ramble slipping out as Ladybug! Also gosh his minimal self worth and wow, thinking he can get the Black Cat back even without a Miraculous of his own, optimism bordering on delusion there I'm afraid.
Very swift intro with the Snake and Aspik, it makes sense to skip it even if I was curious, also love Marinette oscillating between her LB person and Marinette vibes. Also oh dear, he went with the bald cap again and aaaah you fools why did you separate, that didn't work out last time now did it!?
Holy fuck that was brutal, easily her most heartbreaking Adrien chapter, this whole experience is borderline cosmic horror in terms of vibes as a thousand truths overlay and his perceptions crumble, heavy stuff! "Would that have been what made her give it back?" That is still your focus my boi?!
Nino is such a ride or die guy, I love him, great sensation work for Adrien and oooh setting up a future conversation that I really wanna see!
& Trixx is here, to make us all cheer, because oh so many questions now rear! I lost the rhyming scheme but suffice to say excellent lead out location, loved all of this!
Crossing Blades: An ML Fanfic Chapter 1 of 3
Next installment in my Chloe goes back in time AU! Link to AO3, then full text of the chapter below the cut.
Crossing Blades
The warning continued to blare on the ancient radio. It almost overrode the sounds of panic coming through the thin windows and walls of the backroom apartment. Wang Fu paced like a caged animal, twisting the bracelet on his wrist over and over. Beside him Wayzz hung in the air, concerned but silent.
Master Fu stopped in place, eyes narrowed at some unseen ghosts of the past, or future. “I must act. Wayzz, shell on!”
In a flash of green, casual clothing was replaced with armor and mask. Jade Turtle stepped up to the gramophone with determination in his manner. Tap, taptap, tap. Out came the miracle box.
Ignoring the two that remained on the top layer, he reached into a side drawer and took out the snake miraculous. He paused only once, turning away with the green band in hand. Is this the correct path? A life of running had not prepared him for a fight.
Without looking back, Jade Turtle closed the miracle box. The snap of the lid renewed his flagging conviction. This was right. He could bring things back under control and set them in balance once more.
If only he had looked back, he might have seen the fox tail necklace judder and bounce. He might have seen it hop from the box and hook itself to the back of his belt. He might have seen the little fox kwami blinking into existence, the culprit behind the jewelry’s odd behavior, then blink out again.
But, he did not.
-----------------
Ladybug ducked between two buildings. She had no idea if the narrow alleyway was a dead end, she just needed breathing room. Squads of black armored knights marched up and down the streets, attacking anyone caught outside at will. Dark clouds painted the sky, casting everything into deep shadows.
She believed the source to be at city hall, a new akuma -of course- but she needed more to go on. She also needed a partner. She was *this* close to wishing for the Miraculous thief to show up, just to have someone watch her back against the legion of minions this akuma commanded.
To think, this morning had seemed like such a big deal only a few hours ago.
“Good morning everyone. Before we start for today, it’s time to elect your class representative.” Ms. Bustier had spoken in a chipper but uncertain tone. She gestured to Chloé in the front seat, “Chloé, I haven’t heard from Sabrina yet, but can we count on the two of you again this year?”
“What?” a muddled reply came, “No, ugh. I don’t want to be stupid representative anymore. Someone else do it.”
That had brought Marinette out of her own thoughts. Chloé had been weird lately, but Marinette had had her own problems to deal with. However, passing up prestige, not being the bigwig in the room? That was something else entirely. Marinette looked down at the back of Chloé’s head. Was the ponytail frizzed today? There was body language there that felt off, the set of her shoulders wasn’t right. Marinette had gotten good at reading Chloé’s moods in self defense.
Ms. Bustier’s lips made a surprised ‘oh’ and she looked up,”Well does anyone else want to run for the position?”
The kind of absolute silence that can only come from asking for a volunteer echoed back at her.
Ms. Bustier clasped her hands and tried again, “Chloé, why not be representative again this year? You know the most about it. You’re right here at the front of the room too. If things are a bit hectic, I’m sure we can work something out…”
“I said No!” Chloé slammed her palms down on the desk and stood up so fast Sabrina fell off the bench as it moved. “If being at the front means I have to do it, FINE!”
She grabbed her bag and stalked back to the rear of the room. All eyes followed her but no one dared say a word. Rose scooted closer to Juleka. Ivan’s brows lowered as she passed. Nathaniel’s eyes began to widen as she approached his desk.
*Thump* She shoved her bag onto it. Nathaniel’s eyes darted, he seemed paralyzed. Chloé’s face flushed for a moment then she grabbed his sketchbook from the desk.”You sit in the front now!”
The hurled sketchbook opened in mid-flight like a wounded bird, flapping and spinning until it landed on the front desk then skittered off the other side to the floor. Ms. Bustier’s eyes tracked its entire flight. There was one more beat of silence then she looked up.
“Ms. Bourgeois, that is no way to-”
“I know I know. I suck, whatever. Shut up. I’m in the back now, I can’t be the rep. Someone else do it.” Chloé dropped herself onto the bench beside Nathaniel, who fell off the other side, scrambling to escape.
He scuttled down to the front. Ms. Bustier met him and handed him his sketchbook with a gentle, ”Please put this away during the lesson, Nathaniel.” before looking up to the back. “Ms. Bourgeois, see me after class.”
An honest to God hiss was her answer to that.
Ms. Bustier quickly replaced the serene mask she normally wore, “So, it appears the field is indeed wide open. Would no one else like to take the reins and lead our class to the future?”
Alya’s elbow dug lightly into Marinette’s side. “You should do it,” her friend whispered.
Marinette bit her lip. It would be work, more work on top of Ladybug. She didn’t want to let anyone down either. She was always late, even before the miraculous. Surely someone else could do it, right?
“I don’t have time. Why don’t you try it?” Marinette whispered back.
“La-dy Blog,” Alya sing-songed. “Come on, maybe you could get Adrien to be your assistant.”
That sparked a whole ball of feelings. Imagined black cat ears popped into being atop Adrien’s head in Marinette’s mind. Adrien, Cat Noir, a chance to be partners again?
“Mylene!” Alix broke the silence that had settled again.
The redhead gave the girl beside her a friendly shove.
“You’re always into political stuff. Why don’t you do it?”
Mylene smiled for a second before shrinking in her seat. “I umm, don’t know. I’ve never actually been in charge of anything before.”
Alix leaned grinned down at Ms. Bustier, “I nominate Mylene! We can do that, right?”
The relief was clear on the teacher’s face, “Yes! Yes of course, nominations are allowed, though they need to be accepted.”
“Cool. Then that. I nominate. Come on, Mylene. Show us what you got.”
After a look towards Ivan, and another downcast fidget in her seat, Mylene finally nodded.
Marinette sagged with relief. That was taken care-
Alya’s voice, “Well, I nomi-”
A storm of images hit Marinette. Pressure, uncertainty, working with Adrien, not working with Adrien. Mylene working with Adrien, of all the oddball things.
She shot to her feet, “I nominate Alya!”
There was a general classwide blink.
Ms. Bustier nodded, “Alya, would you accept?”
Alya missed a beat, but recovered. “Yeah, sure. That way we get an election, right?” She leaned around Marinette, “We’ll highlight important issues with our speeches, right Mylene?”
Mylene brightened, “Yes, of course!”
There was a general murmur of excitement. Marinette took her seat again, giving Alya a smug look before whispering, “Beat you to it.”
Alya raised an eyebrow. “Girl, I was gonna nominate Adrien. You already said you didn’t want to. I figured it could work the other way too.”
Marinette’s triumphant smile melted into sadness. She slumped face first onto the desk. Alya patted her gently on the back.
“I dunno what about Mr. Modelpants does it for you, but I was trying to help.”
Marinette mumbled against the wood, “You got my vote.” She pushed herself upright and looked down to the row in front of them. “He just seems… nice. I think he deserves a chance.”
Alya’s snort was anything but subtle, “A chance with you, that is quite a reward.”
Marinette went instantly red. “I didn’t- I mean-”
Alya laid a hand on her shoulder, “Relax, girl. I got you.”
“You can speak at my funeral when I die of embarrassment,” Marinette groused.
“I will move the crowds to tears.” Alya nodded solemnly.
Much needed giggles slipped from Marinette’s lips. A sharply cleared throat cut her reply short though.
“Miss Cesaire, you will be ready to deliver your speech in the morning?” Ms. Bustier asked pointedly.
Alya saluted. “Yes Ma’am.”
At the time it had all seemed so important.
Breather over, Ladybug considered her options. She wasn’t even sure where the akuma was. City Hall seemed a good bet. The roving packs of armored warriors were a risk. One on one, she trusted her miraculous enhanced reflexes, but five on one? Ten? She wished for Cat Noir. In a moment of weakness she even felt she would settle for the thief. She needed someone to watch her back. She needed a partner.
A flash of motion -above!- Ladybug lashed out and dodged.
Spang!
Her yo-yo rebounded off the wide-brimmed metal hat of a green glad warrior. “Hold, Ladybug! I am ally, not foe!”
Ladybug kept her yo-yo at the ready. “Ally? Who are you?”
He raised his head, revealing the green mask and a smile. “I am the Guardian of the Miraculous. You may call me Jade Turtle.”
She sized him up quickly. Her height, her age? It was impossible to tell much from behind a mask. He held himself with poise, but also hunched like his namesake, as if awaiting a blow. “Guardian? What is that? Do you know what’s going on?”
He bowed his head a fraction, “I do, and I will share what I can with you once the crisis has passed. I have brought you the means to garner an ally in this battle.”
He unhooked a small box from his belt and opened it. Inside lay an unassuming bracelet of Jade.
“This is the Miraculous of the snake, which holds the power of intuition. It will allow the wearer to loop time, up to five minutes, to find the correct path to victory. Give it to one you trust.”
Adrien. The name popped instantly into Ladybug’s mind. She could have her partner back. She reached for the box but paused. “Will you be fighting with us too?”
Jade Turtle shook his head, “I am here to reclaim what is lost. I expect the black cat will make an appearance, and I will be ready. It is vital the miraculous not fall into the wrong hands.”
Ladybug took the box. Something nagged the back of her mind, but it didn’t translate properly and only, “Are you sure?” left her lips.
Jade Turtle nodded and ran his fingers along the brim of his metal hat. “Yes, almost as sure as I was in choosing you to be Ladybug.”
With that he turned and vaulted up out of the alley to the rooftops.
The box was heavy in Ladybug’s hand as her eyes lingered after the only person with any answers to her questions. Adrien. I can get this to Adrien. No rooftops for me though. I can’t risk being seen and followed.
Ladybug checked the end of the alleyway and then scurried back towards school, and she hoped, an ally.
--------------------------------------
Jade Turtle moved quickly as possible, keeping to the shadows. Avoiding being seen was still an ingrained habit. That which was not known could not be pursued, much less caught. The city swarmed with units of armored knights marching in formations. They were a concern, but also, he suspected, the perfect bait. His instincts proved correct. Commotion, running soldiers, and sounds of battle drew him to his quarry.
The new holder of the black cat stood in a swath of carnage. Fallen knights littered the ground like leaves, but there was a lull. Only one knight still stood, sword held robotically en garde against her.
Jade Turtle's eyes scanned the scene quickly. He broke cover, “No! Wait!”
Too late. The black cat moved, slipping the knight's stiff guard and lashing out. Claws tore metal and everything beneath with equal ease. The knight crumpled into the pile.
“You! You! They are being controlled by the akuma! They are innocent people!”
She seemed to register only slowly. Feline disinterest painted across her sharp features. “Who are you supposed to be? Sewer Hat Boy?”
He raised his own guard as he approached. He knew better than to trust the languid curiosity in those mismatched eyes. “My name is unimportant. My purpose is to reclaim the black cat from you. You are not the one destined to hold it.” He directed a pointed glance down to the fallen bodies. “And you paint yourself unworthy by deed as well.”
She tilted her head slowly, then kicked the body at her feet. “They’ll be fine once stupid Ladybug does her thing. As for my miraculous, oh just you try to take it.”
Jade Turtle steeled himself and dropped into a fighting stance. “As you wish. These bones may be old, but they know many secrets.”
With the moment at hand Jade Turtle hesitated, how best to attack? He must strip the ring from her hand. Protection would be the key. He cou-
There was no warning in her eyes, no tension in her stance, none of the things he had learned to look for. She dropped into a hunched run, legs powering her into a lurching drunken charge that devoured the space between them.
Jade turtle jerked backwards. A clawed swipe slashed through the air where his throat had been. Another lunged for his eyes.
Block. Block. Redirect. Turn. Clear roo- no she was on him again. Catch. Twist. Her whole body moved as bonelessly as her namesake, spinning her whole body in the air around the pivot of his wristlock. Her claw toed boot scored lines in his metal hat.
Jade Turtle tried to disengage. He just needed space, time. She dogged his every move. He was being chased again, chased across the street just as he had been chased his whole life. Flashbacks warred with reality. His foe lunged and it wasn’t a child, it was a grown man in a black leather uniform with a very different meaning. Jade Turtle had been helpless then, he wasn’t now.
He lashed out and struck the man a deeply deserved killing blow to the sternum. Contact evaporated the memory. The child collapsed the ground in its place, but rebounded impossibly.
“So that’s how it is…” She gritted through clenched fangs. “Cataclysm!”
He’d lost control! Dodge. Dodge. Stagger. Dodge. Dodge. Backpedal. Something in that heterochromic gaze dredged up every fear from his two centuries of running. He couldn’t- he needed- She wouldn’t give him room.
“Protection!”
Instinct took over when reason fled. He met her next swipe and caught her just inside the wrist. The turtle Miraculous did the rest. A bubble of Green around that black death-clad hand.
He panted, keeping her wrist held firmly. ”Now… I’ve got you. Surrender. You can not-”
The Cataclysm vanished.
Motion.
Jade Turtle flinched and it saved his life.
Her free hand came around, sparking with destruction. It met the dipping edge of his shield hat and blasted it apart in an instant. The feedback robbed him of his senses and strength. Jade turtle fell. He sensed more than saw the shadow looming over him.
“Five minutes left to show you just how big of a mistake you’ve made.”
----------------------------------------------------------
The difference five minutes could make; a million times over.
“Adrien!”
Adrien skidded to a stop at the sound of that voice. He cast a quick glance back over his shoulder, it looked like he had finally lost them. He turns his gaze skyward just as Ladybug landed beside him.
She unclipped a small box from her hip as she straightened up, holding it out. “Am I glad to see you! I looked at your house first and you weren’t there, so then I checked the school. You weren't there either, so I tried all the streets in between and-”
She paused, withdrawing the box slightly.
“What are you doing out here?”
Adrien looked down, rubbing the back of his head. “Well, I thought, I mean I hoped, maybe I might still be useful. If I could, maybe at least find the akuma and report back.”
Or find Chloé and get the cat back. Or anything just to not be a disappointment. Well, not a disappointment to her. He was pretty sure Alya and Nino wouldn’t be happy with him for running off. He had glimpsed Nino running after him, even.
Ladybug made a soft sound in her throat, “Adrien, you’re amazing,” his heart swelled, “I don’t want you to be running around without a miraculous though. It’s dangerous out here. It’s a miracle you haven’t been caught and turned into one of these knight-zombie things. That’s why-”
Adrien looked up, sure the axe would fall now. He couldn’t account for the color on Ladybug’s cheeks, or the softness when she held the box out again.
“That’s why I’ve got something for you. It’s the snake Miraculous. With it you can help me again. We can defeat this akuma, get back your miraculous, and stop Hawkmoth!”
She’d laid out the snake’s powers. Sass had been more reserved than Plagg, but polite. When Adrien had transformed into Aspik he’d thought he’d caught Ladybug giggling behind her hand, but she flashed him a big smile nonetheless. She even rubbed his new costume’s smooth head ‘for Luck’. The plan was simple, split up and circle City Hall north and south. See what could be seen and meet up on the other side.
That had been less than ten minutes ago.
It had been months ago.
Aspik had spotted Chloé midway through his sweep. She ran on rooftops, wielding the power of the black cat, his power. The power he’d lost. He had the perfect chance to get it back, as many chances as needed. Aspik had activated Second Chance and altered his course. He couldn’t fail.
Reset. Come from the right. Reset. Try the left. Reset. Try reasoning. Reset. Threatening. Reset. Bargaining. Reset. Fight. Reset. Angry. Reset. Screaming. Reset. Go for the ring. Reset. Go for a knockout. Reset. Try to call Ladybug. Reset. Ladybug arrives on her own and catches a cataclysm. Reset. Reveal who he is. Reset. Again. Reset. Again. Reset. Reset. Reset. He’s hanging over the edge of a roof, danglinging from her grip on his wrist. The last light is blinking on the bracelet. He can’t reach- She smirks and twists the bracelet for him. Reset. Reset. Reset. Something is happening. Reset. The world feels thin. Reset. Spots at the edges of his vision. Reset. No, spots in the sky. Reset. Destruction. Reset. Cataclysm lingering. Reset. Wearing away these five minutes like a thread pulled back and forth through the eye of a needle too many times. Reset. He can’t fail! Reset. He has to prove- Reset. To Ladybug. Reset. He is-
Falling…
He can’t remember what he said this time. He can’t remember who threw the first punch. A thousand thousand truths overlap and spill out, covering his senses. There’s only one consistency. He lost, again.
Aspik hits the pavement hard. A storm of black lightning tears at the sky for three, two, one. The snake Miraculous chirps one last warning and powers down. The storm vanishes. Time, no longer abused, marches on. It leaves him behind again. Chloé didn’t even spare him the benefit of a backward glance this time. Would it have even mattered if she did? Would seeing him defeated by her hand again have been the right or wrong thing to do? Would it have made her pause? Would that have been what made her give it back?
He feels numb. The street is a too-hard bed but he feels like he could sleep for a decade if he just closed his eyes. The overcast clouds no longer threaten the end, but are still a reminder of the akuma at large.
“Adrien!” Nino’s voice is so out of place it takes a moment for Adrien to recognize it.
Adrien turns his head, still not ready to move beyond that, to watch his friend rushing headlong down the empty street. Nino? Why are you here? It’s dangerous. Too dangerous.
“Dude! Are you okay? Can you stand?” Nino drops to one knee and tries to haul Adrien to his feet.
The answers quickly present themselves. No, and No. Adrien is beyond exhausted. His legs won’t hold him. He stumbles into Nino. His throat feels like sandpaper. “What are you doing here?”
“Looking for you, dude.” Nino loops Adrien’s arm over his shoulders and tries to take on more of the weight. Adrien’s legs still aren’t cooperating.
Ha. Hero saved by a civilian. But then, what’s the difference? Adrien found the strength to push Nino off gently, but not the strength to keep standing once he had. He sat down hard, but pulled the Snake Miraculous off his wrist. A weary Sass sprang into being, hovering low in the air.
Nino blinked, ”Dude?”
Adrien waved him off with a floppy hand. “No time. Ladybug needs help. Defeat the Akuma. Tell Sass ‘Scales Slither.’ Bracelet resets things. Five minutes tops. Help Ladybug.”
Nino’s eyes darted between Sass and the bracelet Adrien was holding out in a trembling hand. Shock and fear each had a turn, but determination was right on their heels. He took the bracelet from Adrien’s hand, “I’ll try.”
Adrien remembered, “Get the cat back for Ladybug, if you can.”
Sass managed to perk some, and the transformation worked. Snake-clad Nino turned in the direction Adrien pointed, but before leaping away called back over his shoulder, “You have so much explaining to do, dude.”
And with that, he was gone.
Adrien fell back onto his back, ready to let the darkness of sleep take him, hopefully before more knights showed up. Instead a new, high pitched, scratchy voice reached his ears.
“Hey. Hey you. I’ve got a proposition for you. We can both help each other out.”
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Not a vessel for your good intents.
Hey. Remember that Drawfee speed draw from like last year (the one that was also tecnhically a tumblr challenge or wtvr)? Hey.
Here’s an old sketchy sketch (May2022) of some ladies I did for that song challenge, except I only added the two (2) bands I was regular listening to at the time, which was The Crane Wives and The Oh Hellos, lol.
IIRC songs are: Tongue and Teeth (TCW), The Garden (TCW), and This Will End (TOH).
+ Extra best boy Eugene sketch (Jun2022) from Aggie streams w my friend. As a treat.
#drawfee#drawfee show#drawtectives#eugene finch#i. no longer remember which song is for which character#i think i can get the general vibes of which is which. but who knows what the fuck i was thinking then lol#also. i so wanna draw the drawtectives crew more. theyre so. good.
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at the oral surgeon and barely spent any time in the waiting room, where I could have been fooling around in my sketchbook and Vibing. I have, however, spent a LOT of time sitting here waiting in the exam room after watching their friendly informed consent video about how all procedures involving sedation include a risk of death
#cool vibe thanks#I could see my lovely little car from the waiting room I could have been sketching...#okay well he came in while I was writing tags and suggests it sounds like local anesthetic and novacaine might be better for me anyway#but also I can Think About It and let them know ahead of my actual appointment#which is nice#THE THING IS I'M NOT SURE LMAO.#I am very afraid of general anesthetic tbqh but I also don't wanna be Miss Big Balls and do it awake and be Wrong about being fine :'D#getting a filling has so far been Fine though....#doc: it's easier for me if you're awake? but we recommend anaesthesia for very bad anxiety-- I'll be drilling I may have to cut the bone etc#me: I mean the Drilling Sounds have never been my problem but I've never had a man digging chunks of tooth out of the depths of my flesh SO-#I'm gonna consult with my team (people who have had theirs out already) and see what we think I guess#my mom said hers went great and she went to work the next day and had no issues and I BET she stayed awake. similar types of anxiety I think#meanwhile justin severely oversold how horrible the anaesthetic shots are for fillings so I'll take his counsel with a grain of salt#about me
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Oh to be Suzanne Collins and have little social media presence and to write a book regarding whatever current societal trend is bothering her at the moment.
#i am feeling. bothered. this weekend#i am hanging out with my wealthy cousins for their bridal shower--thank christ they are not asking me to bring anything--and tired#everyone always talking about their accomplishments and im liek... pls im wanting to go back to my boyfriend and cat right now#everyone asking what i'm doing for work--because that's all ppl seem to care about in this goddamn family--and i have to say#'i'm looking for something else'#like yoo i already lied a whole year about freelancing when really i was attempting to freelance but not getting anywhere#like i was all 'oh i make x a month just workig on my computer!' when really i was making diddly squat#end this fucking generational cycle of lying about yourself because you have to prove to everyone you are ok#i want the suzanne collins life where i can do my writing hobby without putting this fake social media persona on where i police my thought#and only post about cutesy happy things (since my genre is cozy fantasy; i have no intelligence to write anything more complex#and no passion to write anythign other than sf/f#BUT SHOUTOUT TO MY COUSIN'S HUSBAND WHO ASKED IF I READ AND MENTIONED THE WHEEL OF TIME SERIES AND MY NEURONS ACTIVATED LIKE 'HAVE YOU HEAR#OF PRATCHETT AND BRANDON SANDERSON AND GAIMAN? I CAN GIVE YOU RECS#but other than that i have to deal with my aunts bragging about their kids#one of my aunts is kind of colder and i always got this weird vibe from her like i had to earn her love which... ok. whatever. i also think#she considers me very dumb#the only bright side to any of this shit is im not in college anymore thank christ#all my cousins who are in college still have this... 'energy' around them#you know? that 'wanna kms low key but im pretending to smile and laugh' energy#delete later#tw family
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there is not enough 92sies sprace. i know what you all are doing. 92sies fans did not get on their knees and pick up crumbs to ship spot and race for the rest of us to run off with it and apply it to livesies where not only do they not even directly interact, but fanon prefers because they find the actors more attractive, and then proceed to boil their characters down to 1-2 traits each and ship them in a weird almost f/tishy "dumb feminine man x angry masculine man" way. guys this is a class war not the yaoi war.
#& dont get me wrong NOT all sprace content is like this. it's just Enough#i know this is gonna be controversial but as much as i love sprace ive finally realized why a lot of the fan content doesnt appeal to me#or is just straight up uncomfortable#and it kind of goes with the sexification of funny characters in general which race has fallen victim to#in which ppl remove their depth; give them more sex appeal; and add a pinch of frat boy to the mixture#to make this unhinged sexful comic relief#now im just as in love with btc as the rest of yall but race fell victim to this because he was in the proshot and ppl were attracted 2 him#which is fine#BUT leads to a lot of like.#misinterpretation of his character or just heavily exaggerating certain aspects that made him initially attractive to ppl#which then ends up consuming fanon like a poisoned water supply#it's kinda a variation of sexymanification. fanon making a character stereotypically queer but in a way that is attractive and consumable#and completely overtakes canon aspects of the character. it is not inherently f*tishy but it can definitely acquire those vibes#source: kuroo tetsurou warrior who survived 2016 era haikyuu fandom#92sies sprace is a funny rarepair while livesies sprace is like when the bbc sherlock fandom shipped lestrade and mycroft for no reason#but with the vibes of the ppl who Made Up A Man to ship moriarty with. does that make sense.#the never-interacted rarepair mixed with the yaoiful (derogatory) vibes of 'if this man has no one to ship with i'll just make one myself'#and again i dont think all (livesies) sprace content falls victim to this nor do all people Intend to characterize them this way#i can totally get Not realizing you're portraying them this way until someone points it out#and i couldnt even articulate why i didn't like a lot of sprace content until i saw some passing mentions of this like. An Hour ago#newsies#sprace#dontlistento me
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Sorry for another vent post but here goes
#like i'm not looking for a relationship ok ? but i met this guy and we've been hooking yp#but like he is being all sweet and caring and he is great don't get me wrong#he's like eddie munson i'm not gonna lie#but at the same time he doesn't get my jokes and when i make a sarcastic comment or something funny he always thinks i'm being honest#and then he's too sweet if it makes sense in normal convos? BUT if i am ganuinely distressed (which i am a lot you guys know)#he is just not very emotionally intelligent 😬 and like it's all fun and wtv but i feel like he might like me more than i like him#and i called him babe once bc i had this girl friend who calls everyone babe and i spent like 3 days with her so i called him that#and now he always calls me babe and i'm like 😐 pls stop but i can't tell him to stop bc it will seem rude#and yeah my friends that know him are like he's such a cool guy and so sweet and everything and it looks like we're dating#but like we're not man we're not i met him a few weeks ago#anyway i think in reality i'm trying to find bad things about him just so i can justify not liking him and sabotage the whole thing bc +#+ i'm too afraid lmao#i think i'm emotionally unavailable and don't want a relationship or feel ready for it at all#i feel like i'm starting that age most ppl have at 18/19 of exploring and just vibing except i should have gone through that then#but i never got the change bc of abusive relationships and being at home and not having freedom to just exist#and now i do and i feel like if i start dating someone i'll lose my freedom again#which should not even happen in a healthy relationship but that's how i feel#maybe will talk about this to my therapist see what he says#i think i know what he will say like 'you're just afraid don't think about it too much tell him how you feel'#and i HAVE told him generally how i feel and that i don't want to move mad about it and he was like 'no were just getting to know eachother
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i'm glad i'm not the only one who sees miguel's character hard to capture . i find his character so interesting, interesting enough to watch a hour long analysis vid on yt abt it since his motive for catching miles slowly dissolved into jealously and anger. by for the love of god if u pointed a god to my head and asked me to write abt him i'll say shoot me.
LITERALLY‼️‼️‼️ I love him and his story BEYOND WORDS and yet… we never actually see him in a situation where he’s not motivated by something very titular to his storyline (vs. his character). And ofc it’s a movie so like, we can’t know every single moment of his life (and in fact, we do get very important reactions)… but at the same we ALSO know he’s actually quite humorous and snarky and a lil goofy, too, and CAN BE SO SWEET LIKE WE LITERALLY SEE WITH GABI…
But how does one capture that without making it OOC given the ENTIRE STORYLINE???????????? Just, two coexisting things that don’t really fit without so much thought and detail, and while I love that aspect, it’s also ARGHAHSH when it comes to writing him in non-battle / ATSV circumstances :(((
Cuz he’s so complicated and multi-dimensional LOL (and we have yet to see every facet) that writing about him fucking and cuddling and really ANYTHING could just be about any ol’ fictional man……..
IT MAKES ME SO RAWWRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR can’t believe u watched an hr long YouTube video tho LMFAO I hope it was on 2x speed
#im honestly still pondering his character tbh#and the movie in general#I think bc it doesn’t ask many………#grand questions that pick at our own world#WHICH IS FINE#but makes it hard to relate to in ways that sink deep into the actual narrative (vs. characters and setting and etc)#like how could anyone know what Miguel is really going thru?#CUZ ITS NOT POSSIBLE#so all my realistic storylines for him relate to other selves#vs….. a single reader perspective#(not in a spider person sense but like… there is another you who both you and he WATCH)#anyway#this was great to write out thank u friend!#hopefully we can get the vibe soon u know?#pinkbebopsworld#caitie answers
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saw some folks on twt sayin kiryu’s whole Look and his slightly zesty body language is all a bit fruity in that clip and i aint gonna lie i dont disagree
#and nor does ichi apparently#dhchdhncnc#idk man i think part of it is that he’s not being performatively masculine or anything- probably more so than ever#because I mean. he can. he doesn’t have to worry about yakuza standards. he’s undercover already anyway. and he’s (likely) in a much more#open country in that regard (not a PERFECT one on that front obviously but you get what I mean. in comparison). no one knows him#or anything so why not? who cares? who’d he be asserting dominance over anymore?#but yeah obviously that’s just. speculation. creative liberty. whatever.#I’ve also see people point out that he just looks more relaxed overall in general- like his eyebrows aren’t furrowed like they usually are#he’s not actively frowning which has been. pretty rare since y5.#his whole vibe is less stiff and guarded and. yeah#I like him when he’s all chill and fruity like this it’s nice#kiryu#rambling
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